TMI tuesdays: process of elimination.

August 20, 2013February 2, 2014 by Joanne ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

One of the things that no one tells you about pregnancy is that you’re either constantly leaking fluid, or you’re bunged up.

Those who are/have been pregnant know what kinds of leaking can happen, but this is completely new and unexpected to me. Generally a sneeze/cough/laugh (or even trying to pass gas, for heaven’s sake – more on that in a second) elicits a bit o’pee. The pressure on the bladder from a growing bean is the reason, so I’m told.

Another set of organs affected by this pressure are the intestines. As the uterus expands, it squeezes and leans against the intestines, preventing the effective passage of food/waste through the body and out. Hence, constipation. I’ve tried everything from flax (as suggested by my friend Shellene), to dried fruits (which make me gassy – which in turn, makes me pee. Gah!) and water, water, water… Which makes me – oh, you get the idea.

I have suffered from IBS/Gastroparesis for a number of years, so I’m not squeamish about my BMs. However, it always surprises me just how much I miss them when they’re gone. A friend of mine seriously breaks out when she can’t go, so I’m thankful being constipated just makes me uncomfortable, as opposed to acneic.

Like I don’t have enough to deal with right now.

(with apologies to Angel’s cupcakes in New Zealand.)

weekend wrap-up: mixed nuts.

August 18, 2013February 2, 2014 by Joanne ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

My clothes can’t keep a secret.

family…
We told the boy’s family yesterday. He’s going for hernia surgery on Monday, so he thought it’d be a good idea to get the fam together and announce the news of the pregnancy and see everyone before he went under the knife. Again, my choice of loose attire gave me away – who knew I was such a fangirl for tight clothing ? – his niece Christina sensed that I was about to drop the baby bomb after spying my blue dress. The news went over well, anyway. His mother congratulated us, claimed she already knew, and then was upset because we hadn’t told her before…her baby boy is having a baby. She was hurt. So emotional, that one. Sweet lady, though.

After the family reveal, I headed to Brampton to see my dear friend Radmila and her husband. They’re like family to me, and they were having their annual summer shindig on the same night as the boy’s family do. I’d originally said I wasn’t going to make it, but seeing that my afternoon ended early, and I had news to share, I hopped in the car and headed north.

As I pulled up, I could hear the music blaring. I opened the door unannounced and made my way to the kitchen, where I knew all of the wives and womenfolk would be congregated. Radmila and her friend Karla spotted me at the same time. Karla’s mouth dropped open, and Radmila said, “so, do you have something to tell us?” I spent the night sharing the news with various guests I haven’t seen in a while. I was truly warmed by all of the congratulations. Read more ›

run tell dat.

August 15, 2013February 2, 2014 by Joanne ♥ 2 Comments

This one tells that one, and that one’s gonna tell that one, and so on, and so on, and so on…

I’ve been meaning to expand on the events of a few weekends past, and how quickly the news of my pregnancy spread.

The buzz started at Saturday’s funeral, after I showed up in what I thought was perfectly appropriate funeral garb – black pants and a slightly sheer, loose-fitting blouse. Little did I know that the latter garment would be my undoing. Many of the funeral-goers went to dinner at my aunt Thelma’s (Heather’s mom) for post-service dinner. As per usual, the young people found themselves in one section of the house (the front room overlooking the veranda), while the older generations gathered in the back of the house near the kitchen.

As I settled in to eat, I was approached by my cousin Chris’s wife Darina – a slender woman with a build similar to mine. We’re not close, but I’ve always liked her. I think there may have been some small talk before we addressed the elephant in the room. I don’t even recall if she asked outright, or just hinted at the possibility, but I did admit that I was pregnant.

“I knew it!” she said with a smile. “I saw you at the funeral, and… ” Read more ›

TMI tuesdays: the letter after N.

August 13, 2013February 2, 2014 by Joanne ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

This whole pregnancy thing comes with a plethora of unimpressive side effects. As my body changes, I’ve been stricken with things like nausea, heartburn, fatigue and general tenderness and malaise – all of which I’ve read up on, or been told about, so none have been any great surprise.

Amidst all of the bleh, there has been one wonderful and unexpected condition that I’ve never heard of, or seen referenced in any of the pregnancy articles or literature I’ve come across thus far:

I am having the most intense sex of my life.

Which is saying a lot; the boy and I have always done well horizontally. Our usual bedroom MO is to make a session last for as many orgasms as he can get out of me. These days, all he has to do is, uh, put the key in the ignition to get me to where I need to go. I simply cannot handle all the goodness. It’s ridiculous – yet strangely fantastic all the same.

The other night, I teased him that I’m training him to become a wham, bam, thank-you-ma’am kind of guy.

“Never,” he scoffed. “But I am the guy who will always give you exactly what you need.”

I had to laugh. He’s so cocky.

No pun intended.

Lately, it’s favourite letter of the alphabet.

the un-baby.

August 9, 2013February 2, 2014 by Joanne ♥ 1 Comment

Don’t get too attached to that bump, lady…That ain’t yer baby!

I met Dr. Freedman today.

I really had no pre-conceptions of what she looked like, however I found myself surprised that she was young. Mid-40s, tops. Tall. Brunette. Plain – but pretty. She has a straightforward manner that I like. I can tell she’s not a candy-coater, and delivers the news you need to hear, as you need to hear it.

I learned this as she had me lie back on the examination table so she could feel my uterus. Starting with my left side, she immediately stopped and made a face. “That doesn’t feel right,” she said. “Do you have time today to go for an ultrasound?”

“Sure,” I replied. She waved her hand, indicating that I could sit up. “What’s wrong?”

“Well, I wouldn’t say anything is ‘wrong’ until I get more evidence, but have you noticed the firm lump on the left side of your abdomen?”

“Yes.” I put my hand over the spot as I answered. “I just thought it was the baby.” Read more ›

weekend wrap-up: dribs and drab.

August 4, 2013February 2, 2014 by Joanne ♥ 1 Comment

The weather this weekend was gorgeous; the image illustrates my mood.

a big turnout…
Saturday was Donte’s funeral. It was a massive turnout. Everyone was there. I t was supposed to start at 10; I got there early and could barely find a place to sit. By the time the service started, it was standing-room only. People were still coming after it began, and they were forced to stand outside. It was a beautiful service and a beautiful day. It was both the loveliest and saddest thing I’ve ever been to in my life. Short sentences. What more can I say?

…and a belly to match
I thought I was slick wearing a loose, blousy top to disguise the pregnancy. Black is supposed to be slimming, right? Boy, was I wrong. All weekend my big belly was big news. Read more ›

this wasn't in the manual

I'm Joanne: freelancer/blogger/social media thingy and mommy to Aisha, a beautiful little girl with Down Syndrome.

Tag: first trimester